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Celebrated Actor Forced to Record More Terrible Videogame Writing

Illustration for article titled Celebrated Actor Forced to Record More Terrible Videogame Writing

Peter Dinklage, the Emmy and Golden Globe award winning actor beloved for his role as Tyrion Lanister on HBO's hit show Game of Thrones, will be forced to record more terrible videogame writing for hotly anticipated shooter, Destiny. In a weekly update on their website, developer Bungie accepted blame for the widely panned voice over work in the recent Alpha, and have promised to subject Mr. Dinklage to at least two more recording sessions before the game is launched.


Many fans expressed dismay at the quality of voice acting in the Alpha. Their negativity to the poorly written dialog given to Mr. Dinklage's robot character Ghost even spawned a t-shirt of one of the many flat, wooden lines the venerated actor was forced to deliver, quoting"that wizard came from the moon."

Mr. Dinklage, who rose to prominence after a breakout role in 2003 film The Station Agent, is not the first accomplished actor to suffer through the famously terrible writing of big budget videogames. Actors including Ellen Page, Gary Oldman and sexaganarian badass Liam Neeson have all done the best they can to breath life into the notoriously poor writing of videogames.


As Southeastern Ontario University Professor Jesse Bogost explained to The Green Mushroom, "attempts to raise the quality of big-budget videogames by employing Hollywood voice talent often fall on deaf ears. Whether it is because development time is better spent on technical challenges, the inherent difficulty of marrying the open interactivity of games to the demands of linear storytelling or the fact that most game writers were raised on a diet of Star Wars expanded universe novels, the writing in games is unfortunate at best. For every Bastion, Borderlands 2 or Portal, there are 100 games that do a barely adequate job of justifying why the player must collect 20 wolf pelts to proceed. It is not Mr. Dinklage's fault that his performance as a robotic helper failed to captivate in a game about futuristic humans shooting aliens in space."

Should Destiny meet or exceed the sales expectations set by it's reported $500 million budget and the pedigree of studio Bungie, Mr. Dinklage will no doubt be forced to reprise his role of Ghost in future entries in the series. As he goes into the studio to record more overwrought dialog, Mr. Dinklage will have nothing to comfort him besides his wealth, fame, fulfilling family life, adoring fans and tremendous talent.



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